You know how sometimes on the street men tell women to smile and women get really mad about it?

Well, I don't get it.

Yeah, maybe you are having a bad day.
Maybe you don't want a man telling you what to do.
Maybe you don't feel like smiling.

But you know what? Getting mad about it expends a lot more energy than just doing it.

It's just not efficient to get upset about SMILING when the alternative is to just easily flash someone your pearly whites and maybe brighten his day.

I say, let's change the narrative to a positive one.

If you are having a bad day, you could use a stranger's request for a smile as a reminder that you actually do have things to smile about. You are probably reading this on a device that costs more than some people make in an entire month. You have access to electricity, clean water, the internet, toilet paper. I'd say that compared to many, that is a LOT to smile about.

Also, being told to smile means that someone noticed you. Think of all the people who walk around feeling invisible - the elderly, the disabled, homeless people. What an awful feeling that must be.

So, maybe let's just take a break from our national pastime of petulant outrage and just freaking smile?

Also, smiling makes the world a prettier, nicer place.

So seriously? If someone tells you to smile, convert that negative energy into positivity and just do it.

Speaking of which...Men! Men of the DC area! Yeah, I am talking to you.

How about you start smiling?! I don't know about the rest of the country, but in DC if a man's eyes connect with my own his gaze is as cold as White Walker's.

Dude, can you smile at me if our eyes meet? It isn't going to kill you. Like, what is your problem? Seriously.

And why are our eyes never even meeting? Why don't you look at me? Why don't we look at each other? Why do we walk around this town like robots rather than humans?

Walking down the street in Argentina was so refreshing!

For three weeks I was not invisible! I got eye contact!! I got looked at, smiled at and complimented every day I was there! "You have pretty eyes!" "You're so pretty!"

I got told this daily in real life, not just on Tinder!

And, I sure as heck reveled in it!

Oh Latino men, your lack of hysteria about saying something nice to a female was so appreciated.

So, ladies, can we please stop throwing fits about men who appreciate our feminine charm and chill with the war of the sexes so our American counterparts can thaw out?

I know winter is coming, but does it really need to be so cold?

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  1. If two people eyes meet and one smiles - the other one smiles back, for the most part, unless something really bothers them. No need to tell anyone to smile. Just look at them, and smile first.

    As about men and our smiles... it is all about appearances. Sometimes the day is busy and we must be taken seriously, therefore serious faces. We can't allow our audience to be confused if we don't sent the right signals.

    If for a lady is important to look perfect, and be complimented, for a man is important to be taken seriously, and to be respected. This for man is as important as the compliment for a lady, it shows appreciation.

    Let's not forget that originally women are meant to be the gentler part of the whole, and men to be the stronger one. Woman should be the one to make a man smile, while man, should be the one to make her feel protected, strong, appreciated.
    (I said "originally", because today I hear more and more women to talk about how strong and independent they are... I don't get it... )

    Anyways, the smile remains the most beautiful jewel that a woman has.

    1. Svetoslav Kostadinov, that is my point - people are not smiling. They are not even looking at each other! This is what I suggest we change.

      Hmmmm.... I could write an entire blog on the rest of your comments about what men and women "should" be doing and how gender roles and expectations are changing... but I am not ready to go there.

      I really like what you said though about the smile being the most beautiful jewel that a woman has. That is a lovely sentiment.

    2. Heh, I didn’t mean to write this way, pointing what anyone should or shouldn’t do or what role to play.
      Now I read my comment again and you are right to point that out.
      I just tried to express my view on why men don’t smile as often.

      There is another reason - some men are also insecure, so keeping eye contact and holding conversation can be challenging.
      That holds true even more when the man likes the lady he is talking with.
      Just something to take under consideration.

    3. That is very good to point out that people should be aware that sometimes someone might not be bringing their A game due to shyness or insecurity. Another good reminder that we should all be gentle with each other. Thanks for your comments Svetoslav Kostadinov!

  2. well you do have breathtaking eyes. and your smile is gorgeous. It should be so easy to smile when you are around.

  3. Sure, it'd be cool if everyone felt like smiling at each other all the time but you're so missing the point. You're basically just reinforcing the idea that women are meant to be decorative and to make men feel happy. Sorry, but I'm not here for that. Doesn't mean I won't smile back if someone is genuinely friendly and if someone just makes me spontaneously smile, but I'm not going to walk around thinking "can I make some guy's life better by smiling at him?" You're also missing the fact that street harassment isn't as fun for all of us as it is for you. Some of us have been called names and followed and stalked because we didn't react to men the way they felt we should've. That isn't a joyful thing, generally. Ha. Referring to the intelligent and thoughtful discourse that exists on the subject of men telling women to smile as "fit-throwing" is dismissive and it's also a strawman argument. No one I know is throwing a fit. We're just saying how we feel. Because, you know, we're people too. Not just pretty dolls. :)

    1. Well, you are more than entitled to your opinion and if having that opinion brings you positive feelings and happiness than that is great. I, myself, prefer to just smile because that makes me happy. And pursuing happiness is what it's all about, right?


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