I'm not brave.

After reading about what I wrote in my Desperation blog, a lot of my readers complimented me on my bravery for telling that story so honestly.

But, I have to tell you, I wasn't brave.

Bravery is when you have courage in the face of fear. I wasn't afraid to tell you that story. That is just me; that is who I am. I am honest. I am authentic. I am genuine. I am just me, all the time.

How did I become this way?

Well, for some reason, when I was in fifth grade, and I cannot remember what prompted me to do this, I made the executive decision to just concern myself with my character and to never, ever care what people thought of me, to always just be myself.

Maybe I got it from Punky Brewster?  Maybe from Madonna? I don't know. I wish I could remember. That was probably the most important decision I ever made in my life.

Do you know how much more enjoyable middle school and high school are when you don't care what people think? When thoughts of wondering how people are judging you are not running through your head? I don't know how much more enjoyable because I don't have anything to compare it to but I am assuming it is a LOT more.

I am assuming adulthood is a lot more enjoyable too.

If you are not confident in your character, fix it. Once you are, stop caring what people think.

Just.
Don't.
Care.

If a fifth grader can do it, so can you.

Not caring what people think is the truest freedom you can experience. I am so so so grateful to my fifth grade self for making that decision.

I am also grateful to Punky Brewster and Madonna because I am pretty sure they probably had at least something to do with it.



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Comments

  1. Hi Jennifer. I've been re-reading some of your posts. I'm finding things you've written that I can relate to at different levels now, so it's made me curious to go back and start again. I really like this message. I can relate to being one to not care what others thought of me in a general sense, but previously maybe not to the same degree as what you describe. But a realization I've made to help me get to the next level, and to paraphrase into my own interpretation, I think when you don't care about what others think, you don't have any expectations from them either. I'm finding that to have no expectations, beyond basic human dignity maybe, then every situation can just be lived for the moment. An experience is just that. An experience. Without worry or regrets or other negative feelings limiting the ability to move forward or keeping you stuck in the past. And being present, in the present, is quite enjoyable. The human psyche is quite a puzzle. I'm enjoying your story . One more thing I just want to add, and not to detract from the message ....but they way your eyes come off the screen in that photo, whoa! they deserve a whole other paragraph.

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    1. What a lovely compliment about my picture. Thank you very much. I think that might be my favorite picture of me. I love that you are re-reading my blogs and looking at them with different perspectives than you originally did. You seriously made my date between both compliments. I agree with you about expectations - to an extent. I would totally agree with you if your baseline wasn't just human dignity but human dignity + good manners. If you add that, then yes, great way to look at things. The sad thing is that nowadays manners are in such rare supply.

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    2. Thank you for the reply. I can definitely agree that good manners should be added. I appreciate your comment and can add that to my baseline. I do read a lot of others comments too, and I must say you really don't seem to get phased by anyone's comments. You always follow through with another lesson to the original.

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    3. You're very welcome. Thank YOU so much for your nice and supportive comments! I try hard to lead by example when people say rude things. Sometimes I will admit it is very hard to bite my tongue and stay gracious!!

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