So done with dating

I just do not want to do it anymore.

I hate the whole concept of dating - the idea that I am supposed to meet a complete stranger for a romantic outing when we don't even know each other?

Isn't that a little backwards?

Isn't that too much pressure?

I am just not into it.

Personally, I think we should be going on dates with people we are ALREADY in a relationship with. So, if I ever have a boyfriend again... I'll go on a date with him.

Until then, I am DONE.

From now on, I will only accept Not Dates from strangers.

If it is a Not Date we can just HANG OUT and do a fun activity without expectations. We can just enjoy a moment with another human being on planet earth.

Read my blog and/or my book? Wanna meet me? Okay, I'll meet you for a Not Date.

Wanna take a walk and get some exercise? Talk about interesting topics? Sure, I'm down. I like meeting new people.

If it turns out that we actually both like each other, sure, THEN I'll go on a date with you.

But I'll probably want to go on a few more Not Dates first.

What do you think? Are you tired of dating strangers? Tell me in the comments!

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  1. Not sure I ever considered that a first date needed to be romantic, more along the lines of a "not first date" and if it went well? then a romantic date.

    1. The word "date" alone implies romance or the possibility of romance. So, the point is, I don't want to do something that implies romance with a stranger. Too much pressure.

  2. This is Michael. I agree with you. Dating strangers is more awkward nowadays. Why not just hang out and then see where things might lead to?

  3. I’ve actually tried that. It does / did take away a lot of the pressure. So, how many women who are on dating sites would be offended if a guy suggested a none-date? I could easily understand if the suggestion came across as “oh great he doesn’t think I’m that attractive”. I could be mistaken, but I believe women (not all) still like, want a guy to express romantic interest in them up front. I mean the process of going on a first date is stressful enough that a lot of women opt out. It is my belief that the idea of a man expressesing romantic interest is the motivation needed to actually put in the effort of going out on the date.

    1. Dennis Arndt, you pose a very valid question. I had not considered that angle. I think the way the gentleman proposes will determine the outcome. If he explains that he would love to meet up for a Not Date as a way to avoid pressure but demonstrates his thoughtfulness by suggesting a date/time/location, he should be okay. I am not sure what you mean by "express romantic interest up front" but clarifying expectations is always good and fair for each party to do.

  4. For me I'd love to get to know the person better, have some conversations so i can read the mentality, the mind orientations, and at least 30% of their intelligence and than i may decide, link should start first with mind and thoughts not only the look, some pple look good but they ain't got that mind charm, and their company will be boring as hell 😂😂😂, but for the date it's something special, cause ull share ur soul, the private area of ur mind and body, so that person should worth it 😉😉😉

    1. Hi Wildghilen. That is great that you want to take the time to actually get to know someone!

  5. Wonderful article, thanks for putting together! This is obviously one great post. Thanks for the valuable information and insights you have so provided here.
    Best Romantic Dinner

    1. I am not sure if I should thank you sincerely or if this comment is a very clever marketing technique James John. I suppose, thank you and wow, good job.

  6. Thank you so much for sharing this great inspiring and helpful too.Hope you continue to share more of your ideas.I will definitely love to read.

  7. The American concept of dating has undergone several transformations. I can't speak for the people in the 1950s because that's not my era, but there was a romantic innocence compared to the stressful times we live today. I guess now dating is more stressful because everybody has social media accounts and a great deal of people have let their narcissistic tendencies get the best of them. It seems we all need to take a selfie wherever we go.

    As for the not date, that's a sharp and straightforward idea. To me (I grew up in South America), dating should be about getting to know someone you might or might not want to hug and/or kiss down the road. The romantic patina is necessary but there shouldn't be any expectations as to "best date" or "best date partner." Going out on a date also involves the possibility of rejection (for men and women). In my more frequent dating years, I put a serious effort in making the date a fun and enjoyable one, even if we chose not to go out again, or even if the woman was not my type.


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